She spoke to me in a muffled way. Her small hands wringing in a gesture of terrified detail. I lowered my head and whispered close to her ear. "Baby, Why are you missing patches of hair? I need to know, you can trust me."
It was then, when she raised her eyes in hopeless anguish that my suspicions had been right. The bruising on her upper arms and to her cheek was not from playing with her older brother.
I let her acknowledgment stand as it were and didn't make her voice it aloud. "Does he do other things as well?" I pursued. The eyes widened, the pupils growing larger. My hand reached for hers and I knew. I tucked her frail body close to mine, knowing that this would be the last hug she would receive from me. I knew I would make the phone call, knew she would be removed from custody and from my day care, but it was necessary.
I whispered, my voice thick with unshed tears and harsh anger at a man who dares call himself dad, "No matter what happens, remember that I love you."
Her brothers would go with her, I knew that too. Two little men just starting in life. They had been told they were a nobody, until I had taught them different. Now one wanted to be a chef. Chocolate chip pancakes had filled his tummy and he was full for the first time in his childhood and he wanted to cook and create, to know that full feeling always.
They also learned they could spell and could do vocabulary, in 3 months time the elder of the boys went from an F to an A. He only had to learn to believe, he knows he is someone now.
Tomorrow they would be gone. I sigh softly and snuggle with this baby born to a woman too broken to care, and a man so angry he reflected it upon the only ones in this world that would love him, if he had only let them, instead he let a liquor fill and own his soul.
I would miss them. I wished I could keep them. They had a part of me and I had a part of them now.
My girls would never know this agony. They would see other things, but not this, not even close.
My finger trace her fuzzy blonde hair line where the handfuls of hair were now missing because this sweet 12 year old baby girl left butter on the counter, and from his world, being thrown around the apartment like a rag doll was justifiable punishment.
Oh he was angry when all was said and done. Even though they never told him it was me that reported it, he knew. His butterfly had flown the cage and his anger had a new direction. I had to get the police to come, but it was for their sakes.
In a years time I would see him, the kids tucked in the backseat of a car, at a gas station. Helplessness would fold up inside of me. Three pairs of haunted eyes would see me, greet me, but their hands would be wringing in their laps, to keep from flying out to me and I would go home and cry.
He would hide it better this time.

Tonya baby, where ever you are now. I love you and Ricky and Robbie.

Hello !!
It truly is me and yes, I have been crazy busy.


Upon my return I have learned that I have had my blog a year, I won an award and need to see Lucy about it and have been tagged by Library Cat, vicariously through Sherry, (Who I still owe a snow ball).

*Dons her Sleuth apparel to look further into all this*

Okay campers, I know it's going to take me a bit to catch up with you all. I have read your comments on my last post and truly adore and miss you all. Bob would like to meet me? That is complementary and risky on his part. Thanks Bob!


I see Polar is inviting me over to her new blog, that looks great too.

I think you are a fine bunch of blogamaniacs.
I have missed you all and can't wait to see what antics you all have been up to, I hope everyone has been nice.

Let me catch you up to speed a bit.
Both My Christmas days ruled!
I absolutely love the holiday.
Everyone was absolutely pleased with their gifts and I got everything I asked for and more, including a game cube so I can play Mario cart and Mario Party with my gals. I felt quite spoiled.
*imitates a small italian dude* "It's me Mario!*

I have an adult child now sporting the complete Penguin attire for her four wheels. By the way, she is doing excellent in college. a 3.5 this semester.

I think my middle one can open her own block buster after this Christmas, we are borrowing from her. She can't tell you are there half of the time because her head is wrapped in singing wires.

My little one has sneakers with wheels only in the heels. This is the big sha-bang people. Our children are gliding through life, but after taking her shopping and letting her push the cart, I am envious.

Well, the tree is down, the gifts are being used and the weather is splendid, with a few exception which Prank can explain. All in all, the travel wasn't as bad as it seems but I have been swamped with work.

I will be catching up with you all very soon, no worries.


*Yells loudly into a megaphone*
"Ladies and Gentlemen LET THE NEW BLOGGING YEAR BEGIN!!"

Okay, I caught up with all my peeps here, and I am posting this fun filled paged, borrowed and gleaned from a couple of fellow bloggers.

Polar Bear's list of fun:
1. What is the one thing you cannot leave home without?
My cell and blue tooth, oh and my perfume, and my purse, let’s not forget my palm pilot and my digital camera..

2. When is the last time you threw a snowball at someone?
When was the last time it snowed? Sherry got me with a virtual..I so owe her yet!

3. What is on the wall over your bed?
A giant poster of me …Just kidding…nothing there, I do have a redskin fathead helmet on the opposite wall.

4. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?
Yep, Sure can, including Rudolph. There is Stripper and Streaker (Dancer and Dasher), Show off and Mean Girl (Prancer and Vixen), The C's, (Comet and Cupid) and The two Thugs, Don and Blitz (Donder and Blitzen) then Red came in all alone and wondered why he didn't fit in the picture.

5. Do you grill out in the winter time?
In Maryland Yes: in NY, no. Technically I don’t, the hubby does.

6. Can you put a worm on a hook?
Uh huh, and shoot skeet, knock a compound bow, catch a baseball, pitch a horse shoe, and crack a whip.

7. Will Santa be arriving down your chimney or through the front door?
Santa is waking with me in the morning.

8. What is your favorite chocolate treat?
Café Mocha from Starbucks unless you are shopping the Crisfield Confectioners, then it is dark chocolate almond bark, oh and there chocolate peanut butter swirl or you can always pick me up a Godiva ANYTHING.

9. If you could say one thing to a cannibal to persuade him not to eat you, what would you say?
I have an awful after taste.

10. Do you prefer Italian, Mexican or Chinese food the most?
Oh man, I have to say Italian the most but I can desire any of them at different times.

11. Do you prefer all white Christmas lights or multi-colored lights?
My tree is multi, and the yard is white. So it depends.

12. Do you own a pair of snow boots? What color are they?
I do, they are a light brown. I carry them in the trunk of the car and have only been used twice. They are mostly there in case I break down.

13. Do you have a holiday tradition that has been passed down to you or that you have passed down to your children? What is it?
We open our gifts one at a time, in a family circle so we all can share the joy in opening them.I mean you take the time to pick out their gift why not enjoy the whole show. (I do even amount of gifts)

14. Do you open gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?
I let the girls have a Christmas eve present, and they open their stocking first thing while everyone gets ready to come in to do presents.

15. Name the last good deed you did for someone. If you can’t think of one… can you promise to do a random act of kindness to a stranger before Dec 31st?
Be nice to someone, how odd and out of character for me.

16. What does a typical Christmas dinner consist of in your house for the holidays?
Yumm-o! Spiral ham, mashed potatoes, corn, fresh homemade rolls, applesauce, hot cider and apple crisp with vanilla ice cream.
Now I am hungry!

17. On the Island of Misfit Toys, which one would you choose to take home?
Take home? I live there.

18. What is a favorite children’s story that you loved as a kid?
One? Hmm…I loved Heidi.

19. What is something nice that you do for just you?
I get my nails done.

20. Are you a hugger or a hand-shaker when you greet or say goodbye to close friends?
Close? I’ll hug ya, but you better not give me cooties or that’s the last hug you get from me!

And Now for Belle’s additions:
1-Favorite chocolate?
Dark Chocolate..Godiva’s chocolates.

2-What color is your bedspread/comforter?
New York – Blue Plaid
Maryland- Black and silver grey

3-Last vehicle, other than yours, that you rode in?
Girlfriend’s vehicular monstrous 4 x 4

4-Which is more romantic...flowers or chocolate?
Awww…can’t a girl be greedy? Umm…Flowers

5-One of your favorite possessions?
My wedding ring set and my amethyst heart necklace, first gift from hubby.

6-Your most annoying trait?
My annoying trait? I am overly sensitive.

7-Best place you've gone on vacation?
Disney with my babies.

8-Who knows the most about you?
My sweet Matthew, and he still loves me, that’s the cool part.

9-Last thing you bought for yourself?
Perfume- Reality

10-What blogger would you most like to catch under the mistletoe?
I love you all but no mistletoe. I save that for My Matthew.

11-Last place you drove to?
You are joking right?

12-Describe your favorite place to be?
Anyplace place where my whole family can be together. Summers in Maryland!!

13-If you could be a bird for a day, where would you go?
“May the bird of paradise fly up your…”
I would go to Ocean city and collect board walk fries!!

14-True or False: "If you can't be, with the one you love, love the one you're with?"
FALSE.

15- Do you own the complete season DVD's of any TV shows?
SNL!, Frasier, and Miami Vice.

16-First line to your favorite song?
You think I'd leave your side baby
You know me better than that
You think I'd leave you down when you're down on your knees
I wouldn't do that

17-How do you like your eggs?
In an omlet

18-Last person you kissed in an automobile?
My girls when I dropped them off at school

19-Last Christmas special you watched?
Elf! Will Ferrell is sooo funny.
“You’re an angry elf’”

20-Are diamonds a girls best friend?
They can be, so can a couple hundred bucks on a card, and a trip to Barnes and Nobles, the one with the Star Bucks inside. *looks over to see if her hubby is listening*

I wish for all of you to have a wonderful holiday.
Enjoy yourself, whether alone or surrounded by family.
Embrace someone that will be alone, we are inviting two retired couples that have no family nearby for Christmas dinner.
Be of good cheer. I wish to you all a very merry holiday, I have been on both ends of the spectrum and can say, this is one of my most favorite of holidays.
If only to treat yourself to something special, a hot chocolate and a real good book or a well-deserved sleep in to a house full of family, each has it's own rewards.
I love you all, catch you on the flip-side!

I am coming across so many buh hum bugs lately and I have to be like sand paper to them because I love this holiday!
I love the holiday music, the bright lights the joyous celebration of a baby's birth that brought hope to a needy world.

Yes, you can hate me, and no I don't wear the knitted sweaters with miniature ornaments sewn on the embedded tree, that I leave to mom.
mom has a month's worth of Christmas wear. Oh she tried to create it for me but soon learned that I am not a holiday dress up doll. I have to admit, some of the clothes are adorable but I don't even own very many printed t-shirts let alone a color coordinated calendar event for a top.
*nods*

But I skip and sing the carols while bouncing around the house.
I decorate the living room and still feel a giggle of delight at our miniature village, the beautiful nativity, the bough that runs the beam nestled with white lights and mistletoe and the twinkly multi colored, full-of-memories Christmas tree. I still have candles and penguin toppers and two large green wreaths.
*takes a deep breath*
Yes, that is just the start. I love to buy creative gifts by listening through out the year and purchasing those items you forgot you really wanted. I do listen and jot a running a list that I carry in my pocket.
*pauses*
The best thing about having my Matthew, is that he has his own traditions and I have mine and the combination is a blast. We always have to go ride the winter light parade train in Ocean City and he tells me outrageous lies about the number of lights there are in the exhibit and how one year they had to call him to put it together or there would be no ride that year. I laugh hard as the story varies every year and now the girls and I add to it as well.
This is a game played by the men in my hubby's family. I seen it in full action last Christmas eve while gathered altogether, our youngest, Kayleen had a sparkly embroidered butterfly on her shirt and mom (in law) hugged her and said it was beautiful. Dad (in law) said he had sewn it and described the hours it took, while my Matthew chimed in how he had designed it and the design was of a nearly extinct, rare butterfly, while my brother in law, said he had gathered the die from rare plants scattered on the face of the earth to color the thread perfectly, not to be matched out by my married nephew who described the alpacas he raised to make the thread.
The women who have experienced this time and time again, ignored them, the children were enchanted and I laughed hard. I knew I had found the right home to be a part of all the way through me.
*marks the bunny trail for POH*
I know I diverted but this post is going to stay in this format, a fun jotted post after a day filled with shopping with a Jolly ole 6 foot elf named Matthew.

*runs in waving*
Okay, Here I am. It's calculated chaos here let me tell you!
I am back in Maryland. I've been here a week come Monday.
For all of you who care, which I am not certain who that is, but I am telling you all anyways, here is the schedule for the month.

The 5th was my Matthew's birthday. I made him a great Chicken parmesian, southern corn pudding, sweet potatoe bisquits and smashed potatoes followed by 'made-from-scratch' carrot cake. I burned nothing and he loved the gifts!

We will be going to the Redskin game tomorrow. Woo Hoo! We are die hard fans, and this year it is a good thing.

The rest of the week we will work, decorate, and Christmas shop.
I decorated the NY apartment before I left with the girls so that is ready.

I then head back to NY next Sunday, the 17th of December. While there I will finish shopping and wrapping gifts.
The girls and I will attend my office party on December 22nd.
Then the next day, the 23rd they go to their dad's house, since this is their dad's year to have them for Christmas day.
I will then head to Maryland 'as early as I can get up' the 24th since we will be celebrating Christmas eve at mom in law's.
Christmas morning, Matthew and I will exchange gifts and lounge around until 4 pm, because 6pm, everyone is coming to our house for dinner!
I will take a deep breath for a WHOLE day, then head back to NY the 27th, where my parents will join me and the girls to celebrate our Christmas with a big turkey dinner to boot.
I will finish out the week there until the 1st of January, then the girls head back to their dad's to resume the two week regular schedule, and since mom's birthday is the 2nd of January, I will stay at mom and dad's overnight.
The next morning I will drive back to Maryland for 2 weeks and start the process of putting away Christmas decorations.

*takes a long pause*

And yet, believe it or not, I love this holiday!! And I am eager to play this out!
I get two days of Christmas!!